But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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