he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Randomize
