You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize