and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
