I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
My day in three words: secret purse cake
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
