There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
