Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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