I wannas sexs uuuuu
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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