4 words: hood of his car
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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