Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I'm bleeding and have questions
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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