how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
