Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
