They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
if only i could text you this smell
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
