K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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