5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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