i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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