I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
i now understand why vodka
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
