dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
