i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Randomize
