id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
