i may or may not be watching the land before time
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
