Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
