After last night, I could never be a politician.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
