So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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