He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize