I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
