she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
