I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
