Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Randomize