what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
