wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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