NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
