Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
