its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
