wake up i wanna do it froggy style
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
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