sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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