Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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