If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
