Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
