This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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