elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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