Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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