We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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