i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
