I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
