Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize