You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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