Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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