I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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