Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
